black angel moms, Trauma of it all, Trying to figure this all out

Imposter Syndrome: Are You Really a Mother..? A Woman..?

Have you heard of this before? It’s mega common in my circles because of the type of work I do but it’s also a common phenomenon in general for a lot of folx. If you haven’t heard of it, I’ll give you a definition below: Imposter Syndrome: the feeling that your achievements are not real… Continue reading Imposter Syndrome: Are You Really a Mother..? A Woman..?

black angel moms, grief & loss, Trauma of it all, Trying to figure this all out

Angel-Versary

This time last year (6/6/17), I was conducting an audit for work, rubbing my slightly protruding belly, and excited about whether we’d be able to see the sex of our babies at our ultrasound & testing appointment at the Antenatal Testing Unit later that afternoon. I also was slightly concerned because of some leaking I… Continue reading Angel-Versary

black angel moms, grief & loss, Laugh through the pain, Trauma of it all, Uncategorized

It’s Complicated…

It's that thing you say when you think folx won’t understand or when you simply don’t feel like explaining something to others. Sometimes it’s the thing you say when you’re trying to make sense of your position but in truth, it doesn’t even fully make sense to YOU so, it’s complicated. It’s been a while… Continue reading It’s Complicated…

7 Gems - You're Welcome, black angel moms, grief & loss

APR’s (Angel Parent Resolutions)

It’s that time of year where folx decide to make resolutions for the coming year.  The time when people proclaim who they’ll continue speaking to, who’s getting cut off, what kind of changes to the diet their making and fitness goals to work out more.  Some people focus on setting better boundaries for themselves while… Continue reading APR’s (Angel Parent Resolutions)

7 Gems - You're Welcome, black angel moms, grief & loss, Trauma of it all

When Is It Time?

Weeks…. Months… years… decades even… Time has passed since your loss. Maybe you’re still a wreck. Maybe the days have gotten a little easier as they drag on. Maybe you’re somewhere in the middle. Maybe you can look at the old ultrasound photos… the “mom-to-be” cards… the pictures after they were born and maybe, maybe… Continue reading When Is It Time?

7 Gems - You're Welcome, black angel moms, grief & loss, Laugh through the pain

7 Things I Oddly Miss…

There are a lot of things I miss about being pregnant but there are a select few that really stick out and feel ever-present as this year comes to a close. The consistent intense feeling of grief fades a bit over time but the shorter, intermittent bursts of sadness are hella powerful even 6 months… Continue reading 7 Things I Oddly Miss…

7 Gems - You're Welcome, grief & loss, Laugh through the pain, Trauma of it all

The Value of Trigger Warnings

You know that feeling when something’s going on with you and you feel like you then see evidence of it everywhere? Like when you’re going through a breakup but everywhere you turn, you seem to see couples cuddled up, cuffing season is in full swing and everybody-and-their-mother is getting engaged? Yeah, you know what I’m… Continue reading The Value of Trigger Warnings

grief & loss, Laugh through the pain, Trauma of it all, Uncategorized

There is NO Safe Zone!

*Language Warning so if you're offended by curses, pick another post ;-)* This post is going to be short and sweet because the truth is always more concise.  I heard about a study that found people who lie use more words overall than people who tell the truth.  Makes sense, right? The truth doesn’t need… Continue reading There is NO Safe Zone!

7 Gems - You're Welcome, grief & loss, Uncategorized

7 Ways to Practice Gratitude

So a holiday is coming up.  I won’t go into the sordid history of the “relationship” between indigenous people and pilgrims   but the general message we’re supposed to get out of this holiday is to be grateful for the blessings you have received and to break bread with family and friends alike.  Sometimes, it’s hard… Continue reading 7 Ways to Practice Gratitude

black angel moms, grief & loss, Uncategorized

I Don’t Hate Your Baby… I Just Really Miss Mine

I used to love babies. If someone I know had a baby, I’d be one of the first people around wanting to hold, talk to, cuddle and love on the little one. I can remember my cousin coming over soon after having my god-daughter and me trying to take her out of the car seat… Continue reading I Don’t Hate Your Baby… I Just Really Miss Mine