7 Times You Give Zero F*cks…

Here are 7 times you give zero f*cks…. after perinatal loss…

• When there’s a party in the community

 

• • We lost our twins shortly before Pride here in Philly. I believe the parade and such happened on 6/12 and I gave birth to Jora & Aviva on 6/7/17.  Someone visited us and asked whether we were going to the pride parade.
• When a coworker or someone not in your immediate circle is pregnant or has a baby

 

 

1. • Idk about y’all but losing my girls really made me give zero f*cks about other people’s kids. I know that sounds harsh and of course, I am by no means wishing ill upon those parents & babies bc lawd knows how tough this is. At the same time, I really couldn’t have possibly cared less about the birth of someone else’s child at that moment. Too consumed w/ my own grief to have room for feelings of joy elsewhere. Judge me all you want but where’s the lie tho? 

 

• When your boss asks you about a project

 

1. • B*tch what?! I do not care AT ALL about your work project.  It is taking everything in me to even show up to work today and not just walk out this bitch so…no shade but f*ck your project. 

 

• When it’s Monday and you are supposed to be at work

 

1. • “I’m just here so I don’t get fined.” The realest statement ever. I’m here so I don’t get fired because I need this EAP so I can go see a therapist and I need this paycheck so I’m not homeless. The bare minimum is likely what you’re getting… you’re welcome.  

 

• When bae wants sex

 

1. • So… do you remember that a baby (or babies) just came out of my vagina? You remember how I’m still bleeding?  Did you notice my breasts are leaking milk? Yeah… get away. No wait, can you bring me ice cream and socks because now I’m anemic after birth? Thanks.

 

• When someone else has feelings about basically anything

 

1. • Listen… f*ck your feelings. No shade but really, I don’t care. I don’t wish anything bad on you, I’m not telling you that you can’t have feelings and I’m not saying don’t mention them. I’m saying don’t mention them to ME because…  

 

• When someone asks what you want for dinner

 

1. • Yo… just bring food. I almost don’t even care what it is.  You know I have a nut allergy, I don’t eat farm raised fish, small animals like rabbits, frogs and ducks, and I hate beets. Pretty much anything else is fair game. I just need something so I don’t pass out. 

I know this seems kind of mean but it’s really just the truth. Don’t hold it against us… we’ve experienced the most heartbreaking thing a person can ever go through (in my opinion).  Sometimes we don’t even know how we’re breathing at the moment so asking anything of us besides what we basically need to do to stay alive is extra.  I hope this helps you to better understand folx who just experienced loss and for my angel mama’s, I hope you got a laugh and a “yaaassss” at some point in this list.