#BAMsCreate, Poetry

#BAMsCreate2019: BAM Cassandra

For our 2nd installment of #BAMsCreate2019, we have Black Angel Mom Cassandra sharing two poems capturing the heartbreaking nature of the words, “there is no heartbeat” and the pain of miscarriage. Check out her creations below.

A Moment of Silence
A moment of silence has a new meaning for me. It means “THERE IS NO HEARTBEAT”. No hugs, No cries, No giggles, NO being called Mama. See this moment of silence started as a simple silent moment to a deafening lifetime of silence. Silence of my motherhood, your growing up, the good the bad of our mother-daughter relationship, the mistakes, graduations, our life together. But for you a moment of silence is that a moment in time to show reverence or remember an event, place or person. My moment of silence last forever until my heartbeat beats no more and soul is but a whisper on this Earth.

I missed you kicking.
I missed my due date
I missed the pains from labor.
I missed hearing you cry.
I missed knowing who you would look like
I missed how you would feel in my arms rocking you.
I missed feeding you.
I missed changing your diaper.
I missed dressing you.
I missed the sleepless nights.
I missed your giggles.
I missed hearing you say Mama.
I missed looking into your eyes and seeing my future; your future; our future.

In BAM Cassandra’s own words: I am a Black Angel Mom, attempting to navigate my new life post loss of my only child, Caliah Willo.

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